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The Expat’s Wife - Or How To Integrate a Foreigner!

By: Paul D Brady

When we met neither of us had lived longer than a year in a foreign country. We both had worked for international companies and had traveled a lot, but we'd never settled down long enough in a foreign country. When we finally decided to move together, it was "my" apartment, "my" hometown and "my" friends.

Moving to a different place is never easy, but moving to a foreign country and without speaking the language fluently is even harder. Additionally he came from a big city and I lived on the outskirts of a 120,000 person town. Country living to him! After introducing him to all of "my" friends we found out that he liked them, but still had to find his own; which is hard while working a 40 hour week. I showed him all the great things you could do in a mountain area and found out that skiing, mountain biking and hiking are not his thing. Also doing all the official paper work like driving license, working permit and becoming a local in the nearest pub is hard work if you can't speak or write the language.

All of a sudden, there is a person living with you that doesn't know anything about how things run in your country. Things that come naturally to you and you wouldn't waist a minute thinking about, become a problem. I started to wonder how complicated things are for the expat's community in my home country. Additionally, I found out that my country categorizes foreigners into "good" and "bad" or "acceptable" and " not acceptable". People stare at you when you speak a different language on the bus. Luckily he managed to enroll into a language program and everything worked out fine. He met lots of other expats from different countries and they had similar problems and a similar taste in pub culture.

Since our two children were born we sometimes feel like the odd ones out. People have a hard time imagining that there can be more than one nationality or tradition in one family. They are also being tested if they really speak both languages fluently and if they manage to do so, the surprise is huge. Of course we are very proud of them and of ourselves to pass on both of our languages, traditions and the wider horizon of having parents from different countries.

After living together with an expat and the expats community for almost 10 years (two of those years in another country where we were both expats and I looked for teaching jobs overseas), I think everybody should have to move away from their home at least once in their lives. In order to appreciate how their own country a lot more and to realize that getting settled somewhere else is not an easy thing to do. But I am also sure that many would think differently about foreigners in their own country.

For more information, tips & tricks and general advice on expat relocation or just a good read of other expats experiences, visit: www.expatinfos.com Good Luck!

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