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You Want To Start a Family but He Doesn't

By: Marius Gherghinescu

You have been with him for a period of time and love him dearly. You can hardly wait to get married and start a family but he thinks that this is not the best moment to conceive. You do not want either to give him up because of this, or change your mind related to having a baby, so what's to be done?

1. Find out what his reasons are

Usually men do not want kids because this is a too great responsibility for which they are not ready yet, they do not feel mature enough to become a daddy. Besides, they think their income is insufficient to support a baby. Also, men ask questions like: ''Would I be able to give my kid a proper education?'', ''Would I provide for all costs?'', ''Would I offer my kid whatever he/she needs or wants?''.

Another reason, really common, is fear. The fear that the minute the kid appears, mummy will become totally absorbed by motherhood.

2. How do you convince him?

Discuss this matter frankly; tell him how important a baby is for you, it is not a simple desire, but a new step in your relationship. Do not pressure him like ''If I have a baby I'll be single parent''. This way you scare him completely and he will become paranoid.

Take him to places populated by kids, parks or families that have babies. Play with them together and tell him he would be a great daddy. If he tells that he does not want a baby with you, you need to consider this; maybe he is serious about it.

3. You may need to know that...

If you give up your dream to have a baby there will be tensions and frustrations, fights and arguments so think well if you accept to compromise.